Summer’s Desire (the novel) – VIII.Chapter 15

The long overdue chapter recap…

Okay; so I know that Ou Chen would never have THAT big of a smile on his face. But Peter? Oh yeah.

Chapter 15

The shelves in the grocery store are filled with different brands of baby formula, and Ou Chen carefully studies the expiration dates and nutrition values of every single one, and then finally selecting a few of them to place in his hand basket. Still worried about Xia Mo being left alone back at home, he also buys some fresh eggs and fish and then goes to check out.

“Daddy, I want an electric car!”

The pitiful cries of a little boy echo from the aisle as his dad tells him no, there are enough electric cars back at home already, unless he can recite 99 reasons for buying a new one. Seeing the unwilling little boy being pulled away by his dad, Ou Chen unconsciously makes his way over to the shelves. It’s the aisle for children’s toys but since it is still the grocery store, the selection isn’t too varied. Some toys are for older kids, guns, electric cars and dolls, and some other toys are for babies.

Ou Chen picks up one of the toys and it gives off a squeaky noise. Hearing the noise, Ou Chen feels a warmth fill his chest and thinking over the lunar calendar, theorizes that the baby will be born in the year of the pig; it will be a healthy, golden pig.

The next aisle is full of baby clothes.

Ou Chen very carefully pokes at one of the baby outfits, its material soft and smooth just like a newborn’s. Feeling that small outfit, he suddenly feels like he can see the sparkling eyes of the baby, such tiny little hands and tiny little feet, laughing and cooing with that fresh baby smell of milk…

*******

Standing in front of the house, he looks into his bags that not just contain milk and groceries, but also a baby toy, a baby outfit, a stuffed pig animal that oinks when its tail is pulled – and Ou Chen is suddenly abashed, as if his secretive giddy mood has been discovered by the world. Placing all the baby things at the bottom of the bag, Ou Chen heavily exhales, pushing away that strange paranoia and awkwardness, and pulls out his house keys.

She hasn’t waken up yet as the house is still silent.

Last night she returned home rather late because of filming, so it is a good idea to have her sleep some more. Ou Chen stares at her closed room door, a smile playing at the corners of his mouth warming his normally cold and stern expression. Ever since she received Xiao Cheng’s letter, ever since she found out that she was with child, like a miracle, she has been slowly getting better.

As if there is a new hope in life, she has started to eat regularly every day and although she will still sometimes spit some of it out, she continues to eat determinedly. She has started to rest regularly and even though the hectic schedule of filming has made that difficult, she would still try hard to make sure she gets enough sleep. She no longer closes herself off from other people, and she has started to speak again, even slowly smiling. He doesn’t know whether this change is from receiving Xiao Cheng’s letter or because she is now pregnant but seeing her daily improvement is already enough to fill him with gratitude.

In the kitchen, Ou Chen cleans and slices the various fruits to prepare a smoothie for her, carefully filling a glass full with it. He then warms a glass of milk, toasting some bread and taking care to cook the egg so that it is seventy-five percent done for her.

Glancing at the clock on the wall, he realizes that it is about time she should get up.

“Xia Mo.”

Holding the tray of breakfast and standing outside her room door, he lightly knocks on it. There is absolutely no signs of movement inside. He hesitates briefly – perhaps she is still sleeping – but she has a commitment in the afternoon and sleeping in too late will cause her to be rushed.

“Xia Mo!”

The room continues to be quiet. Ou Chen suddenly feels a rush of panic. There is something unsettling about that lengthy silence and so he opens the door – the blinds have already been drawn open, the empty bed perfectly made – she is nowhere to be found in the room!

“Xia Mo!”

Setting down the tray, Ou Chen rushes through all the other rooms, desperately looking for her, but they all turn up empty. Pulling out his cell phone, he quickly punches in her number but only gets the voice greeting in return.

“Xia Mo!”

Ou Chen stands motionlessly in the living room, his body frozen with fear as scenario after scenario relentlessly pass through his mind, each one filling him with a growing sense of horror. What if Xiao Cheng’s letter had actually destroyed her last lingering hope instead and now that she has finally realized that he is truly gone, she no longer wants to live anymore?! So her serenity these past few days was only just to trick him, so that she could finally just leave?!

Where is she, where is she right now, is she still alive… No, she was still here when he had left this morning, she couldn’t have left that long ago; he’ll find her, he will definitely find her!

Crazed in his hurry to get to her, the pale Ou Chen rushes to the door, his hand just reaching the door when it suddenly opens itself!

That slender figure staring back into his eyes in surprise and surrounded by the outside light, the trembling him doesn’t immediately know whether she is real or just a figment of his imagination.

“Xia Mo!”

Ou Chen rushes forward, grabbing her in a tight hug, using his entire life to hug her, wanting to take her into his own body. His body flashes cold and hot, shaking like a little child, his voice hoarse and trembling as he continuously cries out her name in relief.

“Xia Mo! Xia Mo! Xia Mo…!”
“Ou Chen…”

Xia Mo raises her head to look at him, his tight grip bordering on painful that she feels her bones about to splinter. However, she has never seen Ou Chen in such a state before, that the normally calm him could be so panicked, as if he would go completely insane if she had appeared any later.

“I’m sorry…”

Oddly, her heart twists at having caused his ashen expression, at having caused his pain and torment as regret, empathy and heartache all intertwine with one another to fill her body with warmth.

“… I should have left you a note, I’m sorry…”

During this time, although her mental state has been in and out of awareness, she’s known that Ou Chen has always been at her side, feeding her dinner, talking to her, helping her to clean herself and having her lean against his warmth to allow her to sleep.

Briefly, she had wanted to leave like that to follow Xiao Cheng.

But he stayed by her side day in and night out, serving as her last thread of connection to this world. Even during her most painful moments, she could always feel him holding onto her, tightly holding onto her, not letting her leave – if she ended up giving up everything to submerge in her own hell, she knew that he would do the exact same just to follow her there.

His life is already connected to hers.

“Xia Mo…”

Her words and her body’s warmth slowly bring reasoning back to Ou Chen as he slowly loosens his grip on her, his eyes staring deeply into hers although his face still retains a sallow appearance.

“… where did you go?”
“I went to the doctor’s.” Her voice is gentle as she unconsciously smooths a hand over her still-flat stomach, a whisper of a soft smile playing on her lips. “I asked the doctor that my condition wasn’t too well the past two months and that I didn’t really eat much, and whether this would affect the baby’s health.”

Ou Chen stills; she can actually so smoothly carry a conversation with him now, as if she has already completely reverted back to the old Xia Mo. He stares at her in a daze; she had left the house for the baby too.

Baby… He suddenly feels a rush of panic; he had just held onto her so tightly too, who knows if that had harmed the baby! Carefully supporting her to sit on the couch, he asks hoarsely what the doctor had said.

“The doctor said that the first three months are most important for the baby to get nutrients from the mother’s own body so it shouldn’t be too much of a problem. The doctor also said, that the mother’s emotional state has a big impact on the baby’s development and so it’s important that I maintain as much of a calm and positive outlook as possible. However, you just…” Laughing lightly at Ou Chen, she adds, “… you could have already scared the baby.”

Ou Chen stares at her, from her gentle smile down slowly to her stomach. It still looks exactly the same as before but now the baby is inside, isn’t it?

He dumbly reaches out to lightly feel her stomach.

Perhaps it is an illusion. He feels the lightest of movement under her stomach, almost like the heartbeat of an infant, and his hand suddenly grows warm as his breathing becomes broken!

“The baby’s moving…” Looking at her happily, he grabs her hand to place it under his own. “Feel it, the baby’s moving!”

Feeling for a moment, she suddenly breaks out into laughter. “That’s my blood vessel moving. The doctor said that when there’s about four months or so left in the pregnancy, we’ll be able to feel the baby move every now and then. And the baby’s heartbeat will be really fast, beating at about 140 every  minute.”
“Oh…”

His hand is intertwined with hers, resting together on top of her warm stomach, and this intimate gesture suddenly embarrasses Ou Chen. She doesn’t like it when he acts like this because in her heart…

His hand tenses up. Slowly, he stiffly draws away from her hand, leaving her warm body. Every time he’s with her, that feeling of happiness always causes him to selfishly want to stay by her side forever and he forgets her own freedom and happiness. Because of his dominance, he has already hurt her time and time again; does he want to keep hurting her forever…

But his hand is not able to leave. Xia Mo has lightly flipped her hand over to grasp his in return.

“I’m sorry…” She stares sadly at his painfully thin face, no longer trying to control her feelings and letting everything just completely fill her. “… you’ve lost a lot of weight taking care of me these past few days. I’m not a good wife at all. Not only did I not take care of you since we got married, I always cause you to worry about me.” She grasps onto his hand, her expression gentle. “Give me another chance, okay? I will take very good care of you, I’ll take care of the baby, and I will learn how to be a good wife and a good mom.”

Her warm voice filling his ears, Ou Chen simply stares back at her, a complicated mix of emotions filling his entire mind. He is unable to say anything for a long, long time, only feeling the warmth of her hand like the sun, his life’s one sun.

*******

Xia Mo once considered backing out of filming “Hua Jing” for the baby’s health. But since the film was long scheduled to be entered into an awards festival, her backing out would cause a lot of complications for the crew. And besides, she cannot stand to give up the movie’s material, as she and Xiao Cheng are able to have a happy ending in it.

She asks for Ou Chen’s opinion. If he does not want her to continue filming, then she will respect him.

Ou Chen purposefully seeks Director Wu for a discussion.

Director Wu tells him that “Hua Jing” is progressing along very satisfactorily right now and will probably finish filming in a month or so. Also, he will be compiling all of Xia Mo’s scenes together so that she will be able to finish faster than the other actors. So Ou Chen tells her that if she likes this movie, then to continue with filming. But the instant she doesn’t feel up to it anymore, she needs to immediately rest.

Ou Chen continues to make Xia Mo breakfast everyday. If she can’t come home in time for lunch or dinner because of filming, then he has Butler Shen deliver meals to the set, and if she does come back home for dinner, he has her rest in the living room or bedroom while he personally cooks for her.

He doesn’t allow her to do the laundry, clean the house or the bathrooms – he won’t even allow her to wash the fruit, washing it himself and slicing them into little pieces before placing it in front of her.

“Is it okay that you haven’t gone back to the office in so long?”

Xia Mo watches Ou Chen as he stands in front of the sink, washing the fruit. Xia Mo’s heart stumbles a little at seeing the normally cool him actually wearing an apron and doing kitchen duty, and a stream of warmth rushes through her.

“I’ll go in a few days.”

Turning off the faucet, he moves to grab a towel to start drying off the fruit but she has already picked it up and lightly begins to dry his hands, carefully scrubbing them clean. He suddenly returns to that long ago memory by the pool, in which she had used a towel to lightly dry his dripping wet hair…

******

Before filming everyday, Xia Mo always finds a quiet corner, placing a loving hand on top of her stomach and whispers gently, “Baby, in a few minutes, Mommy is going to be laughing and crying, and will probably be very unstable but don’t be scared because that’s all just for the movie and is fake…”

She repeats this reassurance over again, heading off to film only after she senses that the baby has heard her words.

Everyday, Ou Chen stands quietly to the side, watching her every expression under the bright lights. She is a natural performer, carrying a stage presence in both her smiles and her tears – whenever she is in the spotlight, no one’s gaze is able to leave her.

The sunlight pierces through the haze covering the forest. A scenery like a fairytale.

In front of the cameras, Xia Mo numbly stares at the drawing Luo Xi as he lounges against a tree. She has gone through so many obstacles and hardships to have finally found him; she wants to call out to him but her throat is dry and hoarse, as tears softly roll down her face.

Suddenly sensing something. Luo Xi’s pen pauses and as the forest wind gently blows through, he slowly turns his head, perfect and devastatingly handsome. When he sees her, his fathomless black eyes are filled with an unspeakable emotion, as if he has been waiting for her all this time, ever since he left her, he has been waiting here for her all this time…

The camera purposefully zooms in on those two faces. Time stands still in their Heaven.

As long as she is with him, no matter if it is in reality or in a dreamworld, it is just like being in Heaven…

******

Ou Chen knows that they are just acting. But seeing her and Luo Xi exchange such longing glances at one another, his heart silently plummets, sinking into a black hole.

He turns around to leave. He tells himself that it is not because he minds her shared feelings with Luo Xi in the movie but because there is just too much for him to personally take care of at the office.

He has Butler Shen deliver her meal to her.

He sits in the conference room, reading document after document after document; there are countless things for him to decide, countless proposals that need his approval, and returning to Ou Hua Corporations needs him to put forth his best work.

Since returning from the conference room to his office, Ou Chen’s desk is now piled high with mountains of files and when he finally raises his head from reading one of them, it is already night time.

Staring out the window, the scene of her and Luo Xi staring lovingly at one another continues to flit through his mind, and that feeling of twisted bitterness finally forces him to admit to himself – he did not leave because of work but because he was running away.

Lost in thought, he stands in front of the window for a long time. Ou Chen takes a deep breath; he has already hid for a long time, a long enough time to hurt her again and again.

******

Ou Chen rushes back to the forest where they had been filming.

The filming crew is still in the midst of filming but in the sea of people, he is not able to find Xia Mo!

“Xia Mo left, but she’ll be back in an hour because she has another scene to film after it gets dark.” Zhen En looks at Ou Chen’s return in surprise.
“Where did she go?”
“I don’t know… She just said that she’ll be back before the next scene.”
“Luo Xi…” Ou Chen suddenly realizes that even amongst the hordes of people, there is no sight of Luo Xi. He continues hoarsely, “… Luo Xi left with Xia Mo?”
Seeing his fallen expression, Zhen En fears that he will misunderstand the situation and rushes to explain, “That’s not it at all, just that Xia Mo and Luo Xi went to visit Xiao Cheng’s grave and just left a little while ago. You know too, that Xia Mo was a bit out of it when Xiao Cheng was buried and since there happened to be a break during filming, she wanted to visit him. She didn’t tell you because she was going to come back soon, and Luo Xi only went with her because he hasn’t gone before…”

Xiao Cheng’s grave… Ou Chen closes his eyes. Perhaps he didn’t do it properly, afraid that she wouldn’t be able to handle seeing Xiao Cheng’s grave, he never went with her to visit the site. And now — it is her and Luo Xi at Xiao Cheng’s memorial.

“Wait a second!”

Zhen En stops Ou Chen from turning away, her hands shaking nervously. He’s misunderstood Xia Mo, hasn’t he? There’s really nothing going on between her and Luo Xi, and Xia Mo has finally started to get better… how can Ou Chen misunderstand Xia Mo again! She hurriedly pulls out her cell phone, punching in a number, listening to the ringing on the phone while stopping Ou Chen from walking away!

“Afraid that she might miss filming, Xia Mo took her cell with her when she left; I’m calling her right now, so don’t leave yet!”
“There’s no need…”

Ou Chen is startled. Was his old possessiveness and jealousy over Xia Mo really so extreme in the past, that Zhen En would be so fearfully explaining to him right now, afraid that he would misunderstand?

“Ah! She picked up! Xia Mo! Ou Chen came back, he’s standing next to me right now, do you want to say something to him…” Zhen En happily thrusts the phone into Ou Chen’s hand. “Xia Mo wants to talk to you!”
“….”
“… hello? Ou Chen?” Her gentle voice comes through the phone; there seems to be wind blowing at Xiao Cheng’s grave, as her voice sounds muffled and far away.
“… it’s me.”
Her voice is warm. “… there must be a lot of work to do at the office, you must be tired today, aren’t you?”
“… you’re at Xiao Cheng’s grave?”
“… yes, I wanted to come see him. But, if you’re waiting for me, I can be back sooner.”
“… there’s still a lot of work at the office; I need to take care of some files. You stay longer with Xiao Cheng, he probably really wants to see you.” Ou Chen smiles lightly, struggling to not let himself influence her emotional state.
“… okay, I will tell Xiao Cheng that you and I will come together to see him in a few days.”
“… okay. Are you coming home tonight for dinner?”
“… yes.”
“… then I’ll be going back to the office now. I’ll wait for you at home.”
“… okay, I will be back as soon as I can. But if you get hungry then eat first, don’t just wait for me, okay?”
“… okay, I’ll wait for you. Talk to you soon.”
“… talk to you soon.”

Staring at the “Call Ended” on the phone’s screen, Ou Chen’s smile slowly falls from his face and the light in his eyes slowly dims. Ever since their conversation from that day, she has really followed through on what she promised, doing her best to be a good wife, treating him with warmth and attentiveness, so careful that it is almost as if she is afraid of hurting a hair on him.

Perhaps, she feels that she owes him. Perhaps, she is trying to make it up to him. But she is wrong, because from the very start, it is he who owes her, he who forced her.

*******

The evening wind blows through the cemetery.

Xia Mo stares down at the now unlit cell phone. Although Ou Chen’s voice had come across as warm, there was something not quite right in it. However, she is unable to figure out where exactly it didn’t sound right, only that there is a twist in her heart.

She owes Ou Chen too much. Ever since she was young to when they met up again, she had always hurt him time after time, causing him nothing but pain. Perhaps it is because his love for her was too intense or perhaps it is because she had thought that too intense of a love was a frightening thing.

And then, slowly, she realized that it was this intense love that had always protected her, supported her. Every time she encountered a hardship, every time she felt weak and lacked support, Ou Chen always spread his wings for her to carry her back up – and yet she caused those wings to become bloody with pain.

Luo Xi crouches in front of the grave, placing a bouquet of white flowers on top of Xiao Cheng’s marker. He lightly wipes away the dust that has gathered over Xiao Cheng’s engraved name. There is a picture of Xiao Cheng on the marker, smiling so innocently that he looks like an angel from Heaven.

He quietly stares at Xiao Cheng. He can almost feel Xiao Cheng’s presence in the blowing wind, as if talking to him.

Lightly blowing. Luo Xi smiles softly.

He had long thought everything through. During his time in America, his heart had become peaceful, so Xiao Cheng no longer needs to worry about him.

And she… When she had picked up that phone call, Xiao Cheng had known that it was Ou Chen, right? Her voice when she talking to Ou Chen, warm and full of feeling, the way she stared at the phone afterward… everything is so obvious that even Xiao Cheng would be able to tell from Heaven, right? She is very happy now, with Ou Chen by her side, tirelessly loving and protecting her… she will be very happy and peaceful from now on and so Xiao Cheng can rest easy, right?

He hears her footsteps coming closer. He turns his head to look at her, enveloped in the fading sunset, her face a smooth, white jade. Her hair flutters lightly in the wind, and as she looks down at Xiao Cheng’s marker, her eyes become filled with a deep reminiscence and a warm emotion.

“Xiao Cheng, Luo Xi and I have come to see you.”

Xia Mo crouches down next to Luo Xi, staring at Xiao Cheng’s smiling face and thinking of everything that has happened since his passing. Milk the black cat has gained some weight and now sleeps even more than he did before; she has taken on the movie, “Hua Jing,” and the little brother is called Xiao Cheng, so that their names are phonetically similar, and in the movie, the sister is able to find her lost brother.

“I’m playing that little brother.” Luo Xi laughingly tells Xiao Cheng. “But I don’t know how to draw, so all the paintings in the movie are actually yours, and the entire filming crew say that you did an amazing job on all of them.”
“Luo Xi is doing a really good job; sometimes it’s just like… just like you’re right in front of Sister again…” Her voice breaks a little, and taking a breath, she suppresses the light glistening of water in her eyes, smiling again, “… and, I have some good news to tell you.”

She lightly stands back up.

“I’m pregnant; the baby is already three months along.” Xia Mo lightly rubs her stomach, a maternal glow of happiness on her face. “Xiao Cheng, you’re going to be an uncle.”

The white flowers lightly rustle in the wind.

“You said, that you would become the little life growing inside of me… is that true?” She shakes her head in laughter. “No matter if you were just joking or not, I will love him like I love you, and have him start learning how to draw at a young age just like you…”

The petals of the white flowers softly flutter through the air, landing on Xia Mo and Luo Xi. They both stay at Xiao Cheng’s grave for a long time, until the sun finally lowers itself behind the mountains do the two people finally walk back to the car that is stopped at the front entrance.

“When the baby is born, don’t forget to let me know; I’ll send a present from New York.” Luo Xi slows down his footsteps so as to walk alongside her. He recently has read a lot of books about newborns and so knows that expectant mothers shouldn’t walk so fast.

“You’re still going back to New York?”
“I’ve already selected a major at New York University and I want to finish it,” Luo Xi takes a deep breath of the fresh spring air. “It’s been a really good feeling to go back to school. I feel like I’ve really gotten myself together.”
“You’ve always been a good student.”
“But yet you never even recognized such a stellar quality in me that year. You only said to me – quite rudely – ‘Luo Xi, I will make you leave!’ ” His laughter is infectious.
“Yes.”

She also begins to lightly laugh, suddenly thinking back to that drunken night in the backyard, her eyes hazy from the alcohol as she raised her bottle up in the air, welcoming him into their family.

Who would have thought… that time has already passed by so long.

She had once treated him like an enemy, once been tightly enfolded into his embrace, once promised him an eternal oath to never leave him, once became devastated because of his misunderstanding and breakup… and now, all those past events are now scattered like the wind, and she and he have now become natural old friends.

“Are you happy in New York? If you’re not used to it, you should come back.”
“Actually, it’s the same anywhere.” Luo Xi turns his gaze towards her, his smile as light as the wind. “Before, I used to never feel safe, always fearing that I would lose the person I loved the most, that it would be some kind of a destructive hell if I ever did lose her. That intense fear caused me to become weak and dangerous, and I ended up hurting you again and again. Now I understand, when you love someone, it’s enough to put that love in your heart; a love in your heart cannot be taken away by anyone and you don’t have to be afraid of losing it. So now my heart is full because no matter where I am, I am at peace. Thank you, Xia Mo, thank you for giving me a peaceful heart.”
“…”

Xia Mo’s eyebrows lightly flicker – and then she smiles softly at Luo Xi, her heart also at peace.

“Thank you, Luo Xi.”

*******

That day, it is 9pm by the time Xia Mo returns home. Ou Chen has already prepared a pork liver congee and seeing her return, begins to cook the already washed vegetables. When she emerges from the bedroom, changed from her day time clothes, dinner is already prepared on the table.

“I never would have thought, that you would learn how to cook and also be such a good one at that.”

She takes a bite of the congee, and the delicious flavor explodes in her mouth. The once calm and collected Young Master Ou Chen, and now this apron-wearing husband who bustles busily around for her – so much has changed.

“You should eat more. The books say that the nutrients in pork liver are important for pregnant women.”

Ou Chen watches her as she eats and seeing her eat with such gusto, the corners of his mouth begin to quirk upwards. Suddenly though, his eyes darken again and he briefly hesitates before continuing, “There’s a lot of work that I have to handle at the office these next few days, so I won’t be able to take you to the filming set and I may not be able to come back home in time to have dinner with you.”
“… hmm.” Xia Mo freezes for a moment and then laughs lightly. “No worries, I’ll take care of myself so don’t worry… You should eat more. You went to the set, went to the office and then came back home to make dinner; you must be tired.” She places a small rib into his bowl.

He eats the rib. She places a piece of tofu in his bowl. He eats the tofu – and then places a piece of chicken into her bowl. She eats the chicken. And as she is praising the taste of the chicken, she starts piling many more pieces into his bowl.

Like two little kids, they become occupied with placing food into each other’s bowls, as if playing a fun game. Seeing that the other person has eaten everything, they both share a look at the same time and then simultaneously break out into laughter. Her laughter is exuberant, her eyes brilliant – and she does not see that his smile hides a thread of loneliness and isolation.

*******

Afraid that she will not have anyone to take care of her at home after he’s gone to the office, they move back into the Ou mansion. After making sure she is settled in, Xia Mo almost never sees Ou Chen afterward.

Ou Chen leaves home early everyday and returns late at night. When she wakes up, all she sees is the breakfast that he has prepared for her while lunch and dinner are carefully prepared by Butler Shen. If she is busy with filming, then Butler Shen will deliver the meals to her.

The maids carefully take care of every detail for her, making sure the bedrooms and bathrooms are all spotless. Afraid that she will slip on the clean floors, they switch out her slippers for rubber-soles and place a fluffy rug on top.

“Hua Jing” is nearing its filming.

Xia Mo is busy with with filming on the set everyday but sometimes when there happens to be a break during the day, she finds herself searching amongst the crowd of people for that familiar face. At first, she didn’t even realize what exactly she was looking for until one day, the shadow of a tall and calm figure appears on set and she rushes up to her feet, a burst of happiness threatening to explode from inside her!

Until she realizes that that person isn’t Ou Chen.

Her heart feels suddenly empty.

It seems to be a long time since she’s seen Ou Chen.

Sometimes, she will call him on the phone but his voice seems far and distant somehow. Sometimes, she will wait for him deep into the night and perhaps it is Butler Shen secretly informing him because if she is still awake past 11pm, then Ou Chen will call her, telling her to get some rest for the baby.

In her dreams, she sometimes feels Ou Chen nearby.

Senses him lightly sitting next to her on the bed, lightly caressing her face and her hair, lightly covering her with the blanket and then staying next to her for a long, long time.

The only thing is that the pregnancy has caused her to become lethargic and although she struggles every time to wake from her dreams just to see him, she is never able to fully emerge from them.

*******

Zhen En keeps her company every day while filming.

“Xia Mo, there are a lot of superstitions associated with being pregnant, it’s so interesting!” Since finding out about the pregnancy, Zhen En has developed an interest in newborns, buying a lot of books and even going online to research the various information associated with pregnancies. “For example, don’t use nails by a window, don’t sit on your bed to cut anything…”

Hearing Zhen En spout such strange nonsense, Xia Mo cannot help but laugh.

“Wow, look at this one! This one is really strange! It says that pregnant women shouldn’t eat grapes!”
“Why not?”
“Because eating grapes will mean getting wrinkly children!”*
“Whatever!” Xia Mo laughs again, as the pages of information in Zhen En’s hands are all printed from an online website.
“… pregnant women can’t eat lamb!” Zhen En’s eyes are big.
“Why not?”
“Because if you eat lamb, then the baby will get lamb pox!”*
“Nonsense again,” Xia Mo feels her stomach about to split from her laughter, “then what about people who raise lambs? Are all their kids sickly then?”
“Yes!! Haha…” Zhen En feels herself relax at seeing Xia Mo laugh so heartily. “All of these are jokes from the internet but Xia Mo, you’re way too smart to fall for any of them! You’re so cool!” Zhen En turns her attention towards Xia Mo’s stomach, commenting in awe, “There’s a little bump now but it’s a good thing that we’re almost done with filming because then you can stay at home and rest. Oh yeah, you don’t have to buy anything for the baby because I’m getting everything! I am the godmother, after all. Haha, my cute little godson or goddaughter…”

Zhen En begins to hum a nonsensical tune to Xia Mo’s stomach, who can’t help but laugh at her antics. A thought suddenly occurs to Xia Mo though, that it would probably be a lot more amusing if Ou Chen was here for the conversation too…

She starts in surprise the instant this thought enters her head.

Ou Chen… When did it start happening… that she would always think of him now…

Comments:
I put an asterisk by two of the jokes that Zhen En mentioned because the translation got a little funky there. I didn’t know how to do the most direct translation to English, so I tried to fill it in with something that marginally made sense.

And I know that some readers are still questioning whether or not I will finish the novel translations, and I want to re-confirm that yes, I will be finishing those. I will still be updating my blog but just not with weekly recaps of my American shows that I used to do last year.